Three Old Men

Three old men are in a retirement home. They were a somewhat grumpy bunch, as old men are prone to become, and after several years of living in the retirement home, they had come accustomed to spending the day complaining about everything from the weather to the odd smell of their respective nurses. On this particular day, they begin a graphic complaint session about their excretion processes.

“I wish I was able to pee without feeling pain,” says the first old man.

“Just pain?” says the second old man. “I’m so constipated, I never have a regular bowel movement anymore.”

“That’s nothing,” grumbles the third old man. ” Every morning I have pee at 6 a.m. and then a bowel movement at 6.30 a.m.”

“What are you moaning about then?” asks the second old man. “Your pipes seem plain and perfect!”

“Yeah, it would seem that way,” replies the third man, “but, I don’t wake up till 7am.”


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